Monday, October 17, 2016

Kind of Like the Flimflam Blues

A couple months ago, I guess on the release of the Cutting Edge collection, I was messing around with some Dylany stuff, but now that I know it's literature I'll share it with you my dearest friends.  Feel free to play along.

I got a woman back in Jackson
She’s the only one who knows my name
I got a woman back in Jackson
She’s the only one who knows my name
I gave her my picture but
She only hung the frame

The medicine show man
Told me all about his roots
Yeah he talked about tradition
Told me all about his roots
I said, well that all sounds fine, dad
But tell me, where’d you get them boots?

Well the flimflam man he told me
I was nothing but a thief
Yes, that flimflam man he told me
I was nothing but a thief
I said, Mister, I stole your hat
But I left you your belief

Sunday, September 18, 2016

The Battle for New Jersey

(Chorus)
They're coming for your way of life
They're coming for your wife
They're coming to be free
With your sons and daughters
Close your eyes, make for the back door
And keep going, keep on going

It started in a fishing town
It started in a factory
I just got tired of looking down
On all I saw around me
I just got tired of losing out
My life became a mystery
A plot I could not penetrate
Sullen, mindless misery
The TV shows I watch at night
Replay the same old story
Everybody loses out
There is no kind of glory

CHORUS

First it was the presence here
It was logical, necessary
Everybody knew his place
N degrees below me
When did truth dawn on me
When did I see the danger
When did I finally recognise
The enemy is the stranger

CHORUS

It started out in high school
But I try not to remember
Everything I said, I did
Neither sweet nor tender
Everything made me sweat
I simmered in my panic
Except for pickup basketball
And getting stoned up in the attic

CHORUS

So here we are, swords drawn
On the Internet, blogging
It's life or death, or anything
To keep me online, logging
They'll never take my freedom
They'll never take my tool
I gave up a long time ago
I'm no one else's fool

CHORUS

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Let's have three cheers for Tracy
Her birthday is today
We'll have a hip and another hip
And end with a hooray

Happy birthday, Tracette

Tuesday, September 06, 2016

Work in Progress

Once upon a time, when I was a youngster
The city was my shopping mall and the streets were my dumpster
We’d do shots of laughing gas and boot up itching powder
I’d feel a little nauseous while the music just got louder
By day we’d get our hair cut, by night crash discotheques
Take a couple angry pills, have unclimactic sex
Red in tooth and nail
And I’m an angry white male

What happened to the girls I knew, they’re ugly and they’re fatter
And they try to fill me up with chitter chitter chatter
I make sure all the pretty gals know they need to smile
Especially when they can see that I am drunk on rage and bile
You’ve seen it all on television, it’s an American disease
But I tell the ladies: You’d look so good on your knees
Or you could take the veil
For an angry white male

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Cowboys in White Linnen

There was a cowboy known as Frank
Recited Rilke when he drank
Which, in fact, was rather often
He drank himself into a cowboy coffin

There was a cowboy we called Ace
Lived in a dopey state of grace
Never clever, not a player
Now light a candle, say a prayer

CHORUS:
Wrap the cowboys in white linen
The parade is now beginning
Beat the drum and blow the fife
And mourn one more lost cowboy’s life

There was a cowboy we called Curly
He hit his peak a little early
He liked his cowboy lovin’ rough
Until one day he’d had enough

There was a cowboy, Little Timmy
All he said was, “Gimme, gimme.”
If he’d not been such a fiend
He might not have been quarantined

CHORUS:
Wrap the cowboys in white linen
The parade is now beginning
Carry roses for the pall
To muffle the dirt clods as they fall

Cowboy Jack was quite a banger
All he had was his own anger
Then someone shot off his face
Sorry, Jack. Wrong time, wrong place

When I think of Cowboy Kevin
I wish that I believed in heaven
That, along with other friends,
I’d believe I’d see his face again

CHORUS:
Wrap the cowboys in white linen
The parade is now beginning
Beat the drum and blow the fife
And mourn one more lost cowboy’s life

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Sunday, August 07, 2016

Flag Half Mast

I heard the news
Read the story
Lower Old Glory:
Flag half mast

From my house
I didn’t hear the shot
But doubt it not:
Flag half mast

So much fear
So much rage
Uncared for bodies
Left on-stage

And mine the shame
Mine the debt
I won’t forget:
Flag half mast

Saturday, June 11, 2016

Thank you, Mister Matador!

Well the gents down at the bullring
Knew they had a sure thing
With their swords and capes and fancy sequin pants
And in almost no time
It’ll be their showtime
Where they get to do their famous dance

And the bulls are so excited
They really are delighted
Everyone’s come out for bullfight time
Though the show’s a little heinous
The just want to entertain us
And let us see the fun they have while dying

[Chorus:] All the bulls are singing in the ring tonight
So happy to be in the fight
Yes they’ll all go down singing, “Gracias Señor.
We thank you, Mister Matador.”


Well the ladies are quite flirty
But they don’t want to get dirty
They’d find this whole show a dreadful bore
They’d twirl their umbrellas
And quite ignore the fellows
If they couldn’t see a little blood and gore

But when those fellows lunge
And make the final plunge
The bulls will all go down without complaint
If they’ve helped us make good
In proving our own manhood
They die with the sweet smile of a saint

[Chorus:] All the bulls are singing in the ring tonight
Glad they’re included in this sacred rite
Yes they’ll all go down singing, “Gracias Señor.
We thank you, Mister Matador.”

Sunday, June 05, 2016

Zero Zip Zilch

Following upon my X song, this is my Z song, a Zydeco of course.  I hope you can hear the washboard as you read it.


In the olden days, no one would ever say
That zero was a number
It’s not an amount that you can count
It’s an absence and a hunger

I said hey----  zibba zabba
I got zero zip zilch nothing nada
I said hey---- pretty mama
The zero zip zilch I have is all for you.

And there can be no doubt, when you multiply it out
You’ll always get the same figure
Zero times one, or times one hundred and one
It just doesn’t get any bigger

I said hey----  zibba zabba
I got zero zip zilch nothing nada
I said hey---- pretty mama
The zero zip zilch I have is all for you.

Saturday, May 07, 2016

Sunday, April 10, 2016

X Is For You

This song is the result of 1) hearing a Beatles A-Z show on an oldies station and realizing I don't having any songs whose titles begin with K, Q, U, V, X or Z and 2) playing online Scrabble.

We know X is for xylophone
And X is for X-ray
But since you left me I have learned
Some new words of the day:

X is for xerosis, which is abnormal dryness
X is for King Xerxes, who was a Persian highness
X can be for xu, a coin one-hundredth of the dong
X is for xylem, that moves nutrients along

X is for xanthochroid, with light skin and light hair
X can be for xenon, used for a flash lamp or a flare
X is for the xyster, with which you can scrape bones
X is xenophobia, to which small minds are prone

And X is for you my dear
For there can be no doubt
That you remain the ex
That I cannot x out.

X is for xenogenesis, when baby’s unlike his kin
X is xeroderma, a dryness of the skin
X is for xerography, from which we get Xerox
X is for the xenocryst, a crystal found in rocks

A little word that starts with X is the Greek letter Xi
Used sometimes in physics or in a fraternity
Mrs. Socrates, Xanthippe, had a name that starts with X
And X is for xylophagous, wood-eating insects

X is for you, I know you know
What I am talking about
For you remain the ex
That I cannot x out.

And X can be exalt, exhort
Exemplary, exahalation
Exchange, excise, excite, exclude
Or excommunication

X can be for Xanthus, a city in old Lycia
X can be for lots of things, well you get the idea
A kiss or hidden treasure are often marked with an X
And X-rated means, Oh boy!  There is hot sex!

X is for you, upon
My honor as a scout
For you remain the ex
That I cannot x out.

Thursday, March 24, 2016

Today's Verse: Maundy Thursday (24 March), 2016

This little song came to me as I emerged from a long nap on the flight this morning from Shanghai to Singapore. I hadn't seen your preceding two lyrics, but when I read them I felt that this one could almost be a reply to them, or in some way a continuation or extension of them.

I wasn't born good looking
Kids call me a clown
Stray dogs take my measure
Then they follow me around

I don't think that I am lonely
I haven't been for long
I keep my good self company
And drink my whiskey strong

I see the world's on fire
It's going mad with pain
Confusion makes me shudder
And this is what I say

Fuck it
There'll come another day
Fuck it
You see, the children play
Fuck it
I'm happy anyway
Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it

Some people think we're hopeless
Disaster looms ahead
Some people think we're trapped in sin
Unborn, the living dead

I once thought I was special
A spirit told me so
Destined like a savior
Then it let me go

To wonder what I'm good for
An odd and awkward thing
Part boy, part man, part animal
Down the road I sing

Fuck it, etc

(Bridge)
If I knew
Wrong from right
Maybe I could do it

If I knew
Right from wrong
There'd be nothing to it

Looking back I see a nightmare
From which I can't awake
But that's all in the past now
The future's a clean slate

The clean slate's an illusion
To keep my pressure low
To keep me on a simmer
To keep me in the show

I've vowed to keep together
What Mom and Dad passed on
I have a deep affection for
The people in this song

(Sing along everybody)

Fuck it, etc.

Repeat 1st 3 verses

Fuck it, etc.

Sunday, March 20, 2016

Even Dogs Have Dreams

I finished two songs today.  Just remember, they'll be much better with music.


Have you ever seen a sleeping dog
Running, or so it seems?
He’ll give a little bark or growl
Yes even dogs have dreams.

I lie, neither awake nor asleep
Between the two extremes
And though I neither bark nor growl
I too have my dreams

Oh I’m low
But you know
What they say:
Every dog will have his day

Maybe I have nothing left
But clutching at moonbeams
Well if I must, I’ll live on that
Yes even dogs have dreams

As Long As I Have You

It may rain and snow
Freezing winds may blow
I won’t feel it, I won’t know
As long as I have you

Let the rain clouds close
Let there be tornadoes
Ice caps may melt though once they froze
As long as I have you

Let buildings tumble
Cities crumble, be laid humble
Let the whole world crash
Turn to trash, smoke and ash

Let refugees
Wander through the seas
Stricken down by foul disease
As long as I have you

Let the lame, the blind
Get left far behind
It’s not fair, but I don’t mind
As long as I have you

Friday, March 11, 2016

Saturday, March 05, 2016

Waving Goodbye

Have listened to Waving Goodbye a few times now. The lyrics work well, much stronger sung than read, which I guess was the idea. My favourites are Jack of Diamonds (nice to hear your playing) and Papa Stay and Fight. I'm still not warm to Dennis' vocal personality. Oh well. I know some benighted souls struggled similarly with the majestic Firestone vocal delivery! How did the show go? I liked the promo film.

Thursday, February 11, 2016

News and verse

Hi Johny,
Got the CD, but have yet to listen. Thanks. I'll listen when I return from a week of scuba diving in the Philippines. I need a break.
Here's a challenging one, just for you!

Bad Easter

There are a lot of things
That scare me more than death ...
Like Mexico ...

Like Monaco
Crap is on the table
Then crap falls on the floor ...
Like destiny ...

Like history
A shit is gonna crush
A man that's like his dad ...
Like Sophocles ...

Like Everest
Why not bet it all, all
On a real long term view ...
Like Calvary ...

Like infinity
Drop into a whirlpool
Call home when you emerge ...
A melody ...
A melody ...
A melody ..
Like a melody
A long, sweet, twisted melody

Thursday, January 28, 2016

If you want, there will still be plenty to see

My friend Chris made this video to go along with Along Came Jones: Waving Goodbye show.  She asked me to write something about traveling by bus, and then made this fantastic evocation of the crepuscular consciousness of the open road:

http://www.alongcamejonesmusic.com/videos-3/

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Waving Goodbye 12: RC Mountain Line

We have to go soon, I think we just have one more song, but I wanted to tell you how the story ends.  You know, the first story, where I was in bed, and I heard bells and saw a face in the moon. Well the next day I was awoken by a knock on the door, and someone must have spoken against me, because some men came to take me away, though I had no idea of what I had done.  I asked the men. “You have to tell me what I’m accused of,” I said.  “This is America.”  One of them laughed.  “Wave goodbye, Johny Blood,” he said. “You can play one more song and then the show is over.  Wave goodbye.” Goodnight everyone.


RC Mountain Line lyrics

Waving Goodbye 11: Waving Goodbye

I remember a bright sunny day in December, the year of the drought. You sat in the dark and said, “There’s too much sun and too much light.  I wish I could go away to where the snow covers everything and it’s quiet.”  I offered to build you an igloo right on the spot.   “I’ll make a snow fort out of sofa cushions. You can put on your Eskimo suit and we’ll pretend the dog’s a walrus.” You hardly bothered to look at me, hardly bothered to shake your head no and said, “I just want to go somewhere dark and cold and sleep through the winter. I just wish it would snow, that’s all.”  Then you hopped on your sled and went away, and I waved goodbye and watched you disappear, already going somewhere I can’t go, already looking happier, not looking back to see that I’m waving, which I am, and I said, “OK, I’ll wait here, blue turns to white then green and when the ice melts, come back and I’ll be here,” all the time waving, waving.  Goodbye.


Waving Goodbye lyrics

Waving Goodbye 10: Ash Wednesday

Five Times You Might Not Wave Goodbye

1) Your winning streak finally comes to an end. You bet everything you have all on one roll of the dice and lose it all.  You’re broke now. You beg the croupier to let you stake the watch your father gave you; it’s solid gold, worth a couple hundred easy. You fall to your knees and hug his legs, begging. “Stand up,” he says. “I can’t help you.” Finally the bouncers come and escort you out.  As the door slams behind them, you do not wave goodbye.

2) You see a man in the street, mercilessly flogging his horse.  You beg him to stop, but he ignores you until the horse collapses, a bloody carcass.  You’re sobbing, just stop it, please stop, but he spits and says, “What’s it to you?” and turns away. You do not wave goodbye.

3) You are the last soldier at Waterloo.  All your fellow soldiers have left.  The muddy fields are soaked with blood.  Your uniform is in tatters and you have no boots. Beginning the long journey back to your little farm in Avignon, you see a Russian soldier hiding in the white birch trees.  He looks even worse than you do, and more scared. You do not wave goodbye.

4) The lawgiver, who left more than a month ago and nobody knew when he’d be back, finally returns.  He saw the idol you’d built, which was just supposed to tide everyone over until he came back, but it completely freaks him out.  He totally loses it and breaks the tablets of the law, then he grinds the idol into a powder and makes you drink it, and then runs to the gates of the city, vowing that the guilty will all be slain.  You do not wave goodbye.

5) On Ash Wednesday, the priest smears ashes on your forehead and murmurs, “Now go in peace.”  You leave, but do not wave goodbye.


Ash Wednesday lyrics

Waving Goodbye 09: Martyrs Die For Love

Dogface offered to take me out for a drink.  He was one of my few old friends that was still around. He knew a place that stayed open all night, which is pretty rare in this town, as you probably know.  He used to go there during the curfew. So we’re having a couple drinks and after a while this guy comes in carrying a guitar and a paper bag.  Dogface gave me a nudge. “You know who that is?  It’s Saint Genesius. You know?  ‘I came to make you laugh, but now I bring you joy.’  That’s him.”  That’s why I love going out with Dogface—he knows all those guys.  So then sometime a little later a girl came in holding an empty bird cage.  Her eyes were blank and scary, and she said, “It’s over, it’s over, he’s gone, my little bird is gone, he’s gone away”, all like that.  And we’re just trying to have a drink, you know?  Genesius walked over and put his arms around her.  “Why are people so awful to one another?” she said.  “I know,” he said.  “So much trouble,” she said.  “So much trouble and for what?” “I know,” he said.  And Dogface turned to me and said, “You know, Johny, some suffering can be redemptive.  It can.”  He took a last sip and finished his drink.  “But sometimes suffering is just suffering.” And he lifted a finger to try to catch the bartender’s eye to order another one.



Martyrs Die For Love lyrics

Waving Goodbye 08: Time EnoughTo Cry

I’d heard the band might be able to get a gig at the Elysian Towers downtown.  Do you know it?  It’s kind of a beat-looking traveller’s hotel, there was a big fire but then they rebuilt it.  It was mid-September when I went down there, you know how it never gets too cool here in the autumn, and the sidewalk was covered with crumpled leaves.  No pretty autumn colors, just brown.  Out front there was a cop, or security, I’m not sure what he was supposed to be, but he was holding a flaming sword and smoking a doobie and it scared the crap out of me.  In the lobby, everyone is dressed in white, looking like they were ready to be put in the ground. I say to the guy at the desk, trying to be pleasant, “I hear you book bands?”  “Well,” he said, “the winter’s kind of a dead time.  The boss doesn’t really book bands, her daughter does most of the booking, and she goes away in the winter.  In fact she just left, today I guess, I didn’t even see her leave.  The boss is upstairs, but there’s really no point in going up. I don’t think she’ll see you.  She always says, what’s the point of music in the winter, most people just come here to crash then.  She always says she doesn’t miss her daughter, but you can see she does.  If you ask her, she just says, there’s always time enough to cry. Plenty of time for that.”   We never did get the gig.



Time Enough To Cry lyrics


Waving Goodbye 07: Advent Calendar

I jumped and I fell and I found myself  facing twenty-five doors all lined up in a row.  I opened the first one, and inside it said, “Each door is day.”  I opened the second, which said, “Each day has a number.”  The next said, “Each number has a secret symbol”.  Then, “Each symbol is an opening”. “Each opening holds a treat.”  “Each treat is the whole world.”  “Each world is a face.”  “Each face is a saint.” “Each saint has a bird.”  “Each bird is a stained glass window.”  “Each window has a message.” “Each message is a piece of candy.” “Each candy is a sunrise.”  “Each sunrise is a candle on a cake.” “Each candle is a nail in your coffin”.  “Each coffin holds a gift”. “Each gift can be counted.” “Each counting is a snowflake.”  “Each snowflake makes a storm.”  “Each snowstorm is a globe”.  “Each globe is a stage”.  “Each stage hosts a tragedy”. “Each tragedy is a window.” “Each window is a mirror.”

The last door just had another door behind it.  When I opened that door, there was a song inside.  The song was called “Advent Calendar”.


Waving Goodbye 06: Jack of Diamonds

I went down to the Sibyl’s cave to have my fortune read.  She was very good, all business. I crossed her palm with silver, as they say, and she started the reading.  The first card was the Five of Spades.  “Ah yes, disorder.  That’s you.  That’s your situation.  It’s all of us.”  Then she turned up the Wheel of Fortune. The blue sphinx and the red jackal. The Sibyl was quiet for a long time and I wanted to make a Vanna White joke.  Finally she said, “Well the Wheel is turning, that’s the thing to remember.  When it’s right side up, good fortune, when it’s reversed, disaster.  What it means for you…very hard to say.  If you can tell which way it’s moving, you can see it turning and win any play.  But sometimes you think you can see which way it’s moving and you’re wrong.  That’s the worst.  Very bad.  Now this one…aha.  The Queen of Clubs.  That’s, well, I don’t know if that’s in your future or not.  It never hurts to hope.  And then the Hanged Man?  Sweet boy.  Very good to see indeed.  Some say he’s the martyr, some say he’s the little bird in the tree who was killed with a shot. It’s very surprising to see him here anyway.  Now this one…Jack of Diamonds.  He brings the news, do you understand?  The door is open, but then it will close.  You’re the one who will have to decide.”

I understood. I walked to the door. I jumped.


Jack of Diamonds lyrics
Tracy can check my Tarot references for accuracy



Waving Goodbye 05: It's A Sin To Despair

When the drought finally ended and the rains came it didn’t feel like relief, it was just muddy and cold and dark all the time.  It didn’t rain hard, everything was just always wet. Then we realized it wasn’t going to stop, we’d waited so long and then finally when the rain came it wouldn’t stop, and some of the guys decided to head out but I thought I’d just stay behind. “Johny you should come,” but I, I don’t know, it seemed kind of crazy, two cubits of this and three cubits of that, gopher wood or whatever, it didn’t make sense to me. An ark, you know, it’s not a boat, it doesn’t have oars or sails, it’s just a box.  It doesn’t go anywhere, it just holds things, so anyway maybe I should have gone along but I’m glad I didn’t, and they were getting in that thing and with all those animals and I like the animals, but I know not everyone does.  It was still raining, it was so bad, so dark and ugly, and they all were hunched over with their coats over their heads getting onto that ark.   I don’t think they saw me but I was waving, bye you guys, see you later, I’ll be here, if only it weren’t so muddy and awful, anyway see you later.  I’m hoping for the best. It’s a sin to despair.


It's A Sin To Despair lyrics

Waving Goodbye 04: Why Should I Weep

I know it’s foolish, but I keep walking by that café we used to go to, which of course is closed now and completely unlikely to open anytime soon, and even if it did, I don’t think I’ll be seeing you in there.  But I still shade my eyes and peer through the window, imagining that you’re sitting inside, laughing at some stupid thing on your phone, reaching without looking up for your latte and not quite finding it, and what it would be like if you looked up and saw me and waved. Oh, Johny.  Hi. And I started singing that song you always used to sing about the rose in the hedge and the bird in the tree, shot by some careless boy, and the mermaid. The mermaid makes me think of you: I might hear your voice in a dream but I’ll probably never see you again. You’re not in the song any more.  And then—I know this will make you laugh—I started tearing up, not for me, not for you, not for the friends I’d never see again, but for that poor little bird,  killed for no reason.  And I know what you’d say if you were here: Why should you weep, Johny, why should you cry?  He’s gone but his song still hangs by.  I’m sure that’s what you’d say if you were here.


Why Should I Weep lyrics

Waving Goodbye 03: Papa Stay and Fight

I finally went over to see the old man, much as I didn’t want to.  He was lying in bed with a little thin sheet over him, the window open.  He started talking to me, mumbling, his lips weren’t even moving.  It was like how he’d tell me stories when I was a kid, except now he was the one lying down, and I the one kneeling beside him.  “You know how it is, Johny…frogs, lice, pestilence, wild animals.  There’s nothing left here.  I thought I’d even lost you.  Can’t you just put me in a boat and row me over to the other shore?  Look at me.  I’m covered with sores and boils, you can see how it is.  I can’t stay here.  Can’t you see that? There’s a place on the other side of the river where I can be healed.  I don’t want to stay here.  Can’t you take me there?”  “I know Pop,” I said.  “Except I’m staying.  Can’t you stay a while too?  I know it’s probably only going to get worse. I guess…listen, get out if you can.  I’m staying here.”


Papa Stay and Fight lyrics

Waving Goodbye 02: At the End of the World

I knew it was a mistake to get off the bus here, but it was dark and I was lost. I thought, well this would be as good as place as any but basically it isn’t. It’s not as good any, not by a long shot. I know now I got off at the wrong place and now I can’t get home.  I don’t know what I was thinking. There’s a bus that comes by like once a week at some crazy time, Wednesday at 3:17 or something, nobody seems to know.  I keep thinking I’ll be there when it comes by but then I keep missing it, I don’t even know how I manage to waste so much time, but I look up and realize I’ve missed it, it won’t be by again for who knows when, another week or something, I don’t even know.

One day I thought I heard someone say when the bus would be coming, and where it would stop, so I went there in the morning and I waited. Did nothing but wait all day.  Finally, incredibly, after I don’t even know how long, forever, here it comes, and I grab my stuff and get on, and the bus driver says, “That’ll be $6.75 back in to town, sir” and I try to give him a ten, I don’t care, and he says, “Sorry my friend, exact change only.  You don’t have anything smaller?  Don’t worry, get some change and I’ll be back,” and he waved, and pulled away and I just felt like crying.  And I’m still here, I guess I’ll spend the rest of my life right here, here at the end of the world.

Waving Goodbye 01: The Longest Night

For the Along Came Jones CD release show Dennis asked me to write little introductory texts for each of the songs, so I'll present them here 12-nights-of Xmas fashion.  Jimmy, now that the line at the post office should be shorter I'll resend the CD.  Still the Singapore address?


We didn’t think it could happen but it did, every time we thought, well at least things can’t get any worse they did and then they’d get worse than that.  It seemed as if everyone was leaving and I certainly couldn’t blame them.  Some of the guys said, hey Johny you should come with us, but I couldn’t, I should have but I didn’t.  I knew things would get bad, but I, first of all, I wanted to see the old man one more time.  And then, even though I knew you’d be gone, I knew it was ridiculous, but I went to the old places just to see if you’d be there.  Of course not. Everyone was getting out, no one was looking back, and even though I knew it was going to get worse I just went to bed and lay down.  I lay down and I waited.  For what?  For Santa Claus? I don’t know.  For the end of the world? I don’t know.  I lay down in bed and thought about you.  I could hear the bells up in the sky—but what were they?  Were they, like, sleighbells, jing jing jing, or was it that other thing, you know, the toll of the bell, the end of the world.  And then I see the moon’s full, and it’s all red, and a shadow crosses it, it’s Santa, right?  That’s Santa, isn’t it?  And I see your face in the moon, just like Jackie Gleason’s, smiling seraphically above us all, and I don’t know what to do.  It’s the end or it’s the beginning.  It’s the longest night of the year.



Longest Night lyrics

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Along Came Jones: Waving Goodbye Theme Song

Along Came Jones will do a presentation of the "Waving Goodbye" album in full in January, so I wrote a theme song for the show:

Hello! Hello! We’re Along Came Jones
There’s Myles and Kathy Sparling
My name’s Dennis, this is Pete
There’s Tim, he’s such a darling

Please do not text on your phones
Or play some Words With Friends
Just listen most attentively
And clap hard at the end

Some words may be offensive
And not fit for the kiddies
Please cover up their little ears
If we sing of ass & titties

We’re Along Came Jones, and now we’ll wave
Goodbye and not hello
We’re not leaving yet, that’s just
The name of tonight’s show!


Chorus girl: And now… on with the show!

Wednesday, December 02, 2015

Happy birthday Jymn. You hoped and you hopped and you hopped and you won!

Monday, November 16, 2015

Girl Let's Go For A Ride

Wrap your hair up in a scarf
Come on girl, we’re taking off
We’ll crank Blondie till the speakers are fried
Can’t take the top off my Toyota
We don’t care, not one iota
Girl, let’s go for a ride

Come on darling please say yes
We won’t need phones or GPS
My lack of direction will be our guide
We’ll go to Stinson, up Route 1
We’ve got fog, who needs the sun?
Girl, let’s go for a ride

Let’s turn east and drive this sucker
All the way past Winnemucca
Till we reach the Continental Divide
Or maybe it would be smarter
To head south to Porta Vallarta
Girl, let’s go for a ride



This is dedicated to my dog Odetta, who does dearly love going for a ride.  Note that the scarf/off rhyme in the first verse requires a Jagger-garage white bluesman pronunciation: scowrff

Friday, November 06, 2015

This Prison is a Paradise

Once this world was a prison
Enclosed and yet a blank
Now this prison is a paradise
And for that I’ve you to thank

Once I found I was trapped by
Walls I could not break through
Now this prison is a paradise
And for that I thank you

Dreams, ah I have dreams
I see the world breaking at the seams
And yet now I’ve found peace
I’ve found release, yes I’m released

I couldn’t bear this tiny world
That time and trouble shrank
But this prison is a paradise
And for that I’ve you to thank

Sunday, September 27, 2015

The Prince's Rejoinder

Used to be charms rhymed with arms
Both were currency
To trade and barter for romance
For bliss, for ecstasy

What rhymes with cunt?
A cake of bundt?
What rhymes with cock?
A strap of jock?

How our currency's debased
It's lost intrinsic value
You can't get nothin' for somethin' now
The market won't allow you

You get nothing
You get something
Everything's a bargain
Everyone's an easy lay
We're all broken-hearted

Don't I wish that I could lie
In love in your embrace
Beauty sketched - serene, eternal -
Here upon your face
The spirit that moves me,
The spirit of grace,
Charms, beguiles, intoxicates
Let's lie forever in this state
Between rest and bold desire
Let's lie, the pith of truth to taste,
So sweet, it burns like fire.

Saturday, September 26, 2015

La Belle au Bois Dormante



Of all the gifts I’ve been given, though it may sound perverse
My favorite was the one that some called a curse
That I should grow up perfectly, like a flower bud
But fall into a sleep like death when first I saw my blood

And here you are to wake me
You’ve stormed the palace door
But oh my dear Prince Charming
Can’t I sleep five minutes more?

It was you who slayed the dragon, who braved the thorny hedge
Just as I had hoped for, just as you had pledged
We’re living out the story, each the archetype
But what if, when you taste the fruit you find it’s still unripe?

And here you are to wake me
The one I’ve waited for
But oh my dear Prince Charming
Can’t I sleep five minutes more?

When I awake we’ll lead a life of banquets, hunts and balls
We’ll have the servants wipe 100 years of dust off those glass halls
And happily ever after I will be the Charming wife
But can’t I sleep a little more before we start that life?

Now you’re here to wake me
But please my sweet señor
Oh please my dear Prince Charming
Can’t I sleep five minutes more?




Sunday, September 20, 2015

Along Came Jones: Waving Goodbye

Yeah, so the Moron said you should come out with me, I have to wait for the bus, it leaves at 5 AM but there’s a bar next to the bus station, just come out with me, and I did, we went to the bar next door to the bus station and stayed up all night drinking. The bar wasn’t very nice. The people looked all gray in the bar light and most of them were just staring, not at their phones like normal people but just, you know, waiting.  And the Moron said, yeah so I guess I’m really going, I have to go see the old man, I’m not sure how long I’ll be gone, and it made me feel bad, I didn’t really want him to have to go and I had a feeling he wouldn’t be back but I didn’t know what to say, so we talked about stupid stuff, and he looked at me with that dumb, perpetually surprised look that’s so infuriating, until finally he said well I guess it’s time, it was just before 5 and we went out to the bus and the Moron said OK well thanks for coming out and got on the bus and found a seat and put his stuff overhead and took out a book and started to read.  And I was just standing there and he looked up and waved and then looked back at his book and the bus pulled away and I was just standing there, goodbye goodbye goodbye.  And that was it, the bus was gone, the Moron had left, goodbye. The sun wasn’t even up and it smelled like diesel fuel and I tried to remember how to get back home. 

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Another year has gone by
Due to the orbit of the earth
And so we once more celebrate
The day of Tracy's birth

Many happy returns of the day Tracette!

Saturday, July 25, 2015

While you're wondering what to do with your life

You've done something to your face. An eye's a little smaller, something's happened to your mouth. My body's improving, but it will never change. Every little bloom, fluorescence, suggests decay in foretelling. If it's not broke, you can't fix it. If it's impatient, it will mistake. The fields, the jungle, are over-subscribed. The market's high, but it will fade. My mother, the liar, has discovered honesty in literature (!) at an advanced age. That means, I hope, permission to be ugly, mean, unkind. Though permission is not and never was and will never be required to be an asshole. It comes naturally. Fighter planes roar across the evening sky, practicing for the show, which is itself a dry run for the real thing. Then, again, everyone will suffer and die and wonder at the wasted, golden years gone by. What happened? Was I dreaming? Why didn't I prepare? The end is always the same, anyway. It's what you leave behind -- but that's out of your hands, and has been since it came out. There's been a murder next door. Don't yet know who killed and who died. It came to light by the smell. Around the same time, the garden was being plundered by thieves who shit to mark their attendance at your place. All this while we're sleeping and the guard's afraid to leave the guardhouse. When that happens, the police have to hurt somebody. No wonder the poor girl hung herself in her cell. Let's make a pact. OK, let's lie, but pretend we believe it and maybe some of it will come to pass -- like the existence of Switzerland from the Treaty of Vienna. It was a small clause, but helped a lot of people who have lived and died since 1815. Bless them.

Monday, July 13, 2015

Sunday, June 28, 2015

An Almost-Pefect Day

A lightweight tribute to Lou:


Sitting outside, reading Frank O’Hara
Spinach omelette and café au lait
Billie’s singing “Say It With A Kiss”
This could be an almost perfect day

It was foggy when I got up this morning
But by noon the fog had blown away
If only you were still here in my life
This would be an almost perfect day

If I manage to forget
That you’re not here to turn to
And I can learn to
Practice self-deception
The day’s complete perfection

Tonight I’ll meet up with some friends for cocktails
And when it’s time to finally hit the hay
I know I’ll go to bed alone and lonely
Still, it’ll be an almost perfect day